It started with a hand gun, loaded with excuses
Now I'm coming apart at the seams
From all the scrapes and bruises, to the familiar abuses
I'll kick and scream but it'll never change anything
Because I've become so numb

In my head I thought, "Just maybe you need this"
Maybe I didn't at first, But maybe, Just maybe
Now I need this too...But where are you?

Did you decide to just boycott love?
To detox so you can retox?
You would promise me anything for another shot at life
I had forgotten that there's no need to rush
Since we're all just waiting...
...Waiting to Die

Nobody every really want to hear you sing about tragedy
So I whisper all these secrets
To a blank page on a line like a runaway
I spend these nights counting stars like a runaway

'Cause this is not the man I want to be
I'm just trying to stop the bleeding
I'm not sure how to word it
I just started to deserve it
Now everything in my life
Has become another worthless alibis

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The Journal Above Is Composed/Inspired By Multiple Songs, Which Are:
Push - Marianas Trench, Alibis - Marianas Trench,
Disloyal Order Of Water Buffalo - Fall Out Boy,
My Friends Over You - New Found Glory, Numb - Linkin Park,
Waiting - City and Colour, and Runaway - Thriving Ivory